This evening Chase told me he wanted me to leave him alone for a couple of weeks. That's the nicer version of how the conversation went, and needless to say...I am HURT. I feel broken. I feel like this is somehow my fault, but yet know that it's not. I know this is him needing to figure out what he wants. But it doesn't help mend my heart. It just intensifies it knowing that he's unsure - when I feel so sure. I'm not sure what the end result will be of this "alone time" and how it will work out with us living together. But what I do know is that I will be reflecting. And grieving. And trying to not hurt too badly when I have a life to lead and other people surrounding me who want me. To love me and to be there for me.
Like my mom. She is the greatest. Really, my family as a whole is the greatest. Knowing how much I'm going through in life right now with not only this, but also a recent death of a loved one, she bought me a ticket to Indiana for our family reunion this coming up weekend.
Words cannot describe how excited and thankful I am for this little mini vacation. I finally get to meet my precious niece, Adelaide. I get to hike "our" trails at Turkey Run. This weekend is the only thing that is keeping me going right now. I can attempt to hold my head up high throughout the week knowing that I have my family to see at the end.
<3
2 comments:
Love.
Can't wait to see you.
I hope the time home in Indiana was peaceful, though we were so busy. I love you and hope the situation with Chase is resolved. Regardless of what happens, you have me, us (all the family). We will be there through anything!
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